Embrace positive thinking and end the loneliness in your life

While some time alone, especially for those who choose to meditate, is proven to be incredibly therapeutic, extended days or even weeks of isolation have the complete opposite effect. For those experiencing such loneliness – it becomes more difficult to be positive – but if you are in this position right now, be assured, it is not impossible and if you are ready – let’s begin.

The first step is to decide that you are fed up talking to the wall. It will be difficult to start with because you are what you think and enforced periods of isolation has allowed you to dwell in the past. Almost certainly you keep considering the good times you once had, mourning the passing of such events and have sub consciously decided that you are unlikely to ever be happy again – you get the idea.

As the years pass, older people in particular, become trapped in a downward spiral making it even more difficult to interact with others. They gradually lose contact with people and slowly they allow their lives to be taken over by the debilitating effect of loneliness.

Ok! So far, not so positive and if you are reading this and thinking – yes, that’s definitely me – then it’s about time that you started doing something about it – and what is there to lose? Let’s start by identifying where the loneliness began for you – was it divorce, the passing of a much loved spouse or partner, children or other close relatives moving away, old age or the inevitable loss of close friends – there was a moment or a time when you began the gradual slide towards the loneliness you are now feeling and that is the point from where you rebuild.

Why that particular moment? It was the time when you were not experiencing loneliness and you need to recapture that moment and remember how you felt then. You need to confront the issues that caused the downward spiral in your life and ask yourself a few questions – what happened? Did I allow it to defeat me? Did I take any action to rebuild my life? Did I surrender to feelings of sadness and negativity?

It might be a combination of all these things, but everyone is unique so you will find your own questions and of course – you will need to find the answers as well. Powerful positive thinking offers a solution and a way forward even if you have experienced loneliness and isolation for many years, but you will need courage, plenty of common sense and if you really want to change your life you will also need the other key ingredient – action.

First decide what you really need to end the isolation you now feel – it will obviously be different for every person. It will range from a bit of extra company from time to time for some to a whole new life style change for others – only you will know what you need.

Write it down, take time with this to specify the new life you wish to attract and the type of people you want to share it with. Make sure you add plenty of detail and common sense – this is your specification and you need to get it right so make sure that you add plenty of happiness, joy and realistic goals. Just doing this will help to change your mind set.

You might well be saying at this point that you have been focussing on the same dream for months and nothing has happened. Just because you have written it down, what’s the big difference – good question and an easy answer?

This is the bottom line – you have focussed so hard on a solution to end your loneliness and the Universe has listened and assumed that is exactly what you want – more loneliness – and that is what it has delivered.

Hopefully, you have now thought about what you need for the last time. You have written it down and now I want you to destroy the note. The Universe has received your new order and is ready to knock on your door as long as you let it get on with its job – so forget about it.

What you now need is courage and action. No one has to be totally alone – there are thousands of groups, charities and clubs that would welcome someone like you. There are night schools and courses you can undertake, there are singles holidays – the list goes on. Get on the internet, look in the local paper and choose to start your new life.

You have to be ready to give the Universe a helping hand to deliver your order and if you are taking action you are speeding up the process. That’s the real power of positive thinking – are you ready?

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There is no such thing as coincidence – it is all down to the way you think

You are attracting people and events towards you, consciously and unconsciously, by the strength of your thoughts. For those that consistently practice the power of positive thinking you are acting as a magnet to others who will help you succeed, who will become future lovers or partners – and because these people will naturally be on your wavelength then everything you desire will follow.

If you are pessimistic and negative by nature you will also be acting as a magnet, but in your case you will be attracting the wrong kind of support. People will come into your life who are equally as negative, possibly abusive or worse. They are not looking to give you anything – quite the reverse – they are takers and will drain you.

Negative thinking of this kind is why so many people continue to attract losers again and again, quickly swapping one abusive relationship for another, a further business failure or another loss to add to an ever growing list

The sad thing is that most people are completely oblivious of what they are doing, totally unaware that they are constantly sending out messages to the Universe, stimulating the Law of Attraction by their thoughts – and guess what – that’s what the Universe thinks you want and it will always deliver.

Right now you might be asking what this article has to do with coincidence – good question so let’s go for the explanation. To fully grasp the concept you need to fully understand how you think, what it is that you are constantly wishing for and to do this you must start looking at your day dreams, your fears, ambitions, worries – you get the idea.

Your conscious thoughts will be a hotch potch of aspirations, random ideas, caution and navel gazing which will be constantly interrupted by the pressures of a normal day – work, getting the kids to school, health – dozens of different things. But if you just stop for a moment, take a bit of time out and for at least five minutes think about what you are thinking.

What will emerge will be one underlying strong theme that links many of those random thoughts. It could be money problems, marriage or other types of relationship worries. You might discover that you have fears you have yet to confront such as losing your job, the health of a close relative or something more immediate that is causing you stress.

Without realising it you have sent out your message to the Universe, it has received your order and is now making sure that it will be delivered. To do this it will create events and attract people into your life that will be good or bad depending on whether you are naturally positive or negative – and when that happens you will probably think – what a coincidence.

You would be wrong because as I said at the beginning of this article, there is no such thing as coincidence. You brought that person into your life, you made that event happen and you are the architect and chief planner of what happens next.

If you are not happy with the story thus far then you have to ask yourself the question – what am I going to do about it? Hopefully you have spent at least five minutes thinking about your thoughts and if you have done it properly then you will have a good idea of what you are sending out to the Universe.

Let’s assume you are unhappy with the storyline then you are going to have to write a new one. So start off with a pen and paper and write down all the stuff you don’t like and then make a note that from this point onwards all that negativity is officially deleted.

It has to be replaced with something and this where you need to embrace the power of positive thinking. Write down your goals and aspirations, get rid of the losers and replace them with the good people just waiting to be part of your new life.

Take as long as you like with this process and when you are happy that you have the right specification then destroy that paper. Your order has been received, the negative one has been deleted and all you have to do is wait for the delivery man.

It is vital that you now forget all about this order. In your previous life when you were oblivious to what you were attracting then you were happy for the Universe to get on with it. Do the same again with the new positive you because if you keep focussing on the order you will drive it away.

Slowly but surely complete strangers or peculiar events will begin to happen which bring your dreams a little closer – nothing to do with coincidence – just the power of thought, your thoughts

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You are the product – so let’s turn failure into success

You choose the way you respond to failure, you decide whether it is a complete disaster at one end of the scale or a gentle correction on life’s journey. The choice is how you react when things go wrong – or to be more precise, it is the way you always react to failure – because there is every possibility that it has happened again and again in your life.

If you fail and then declare to the world that nothing ever goes right for you then you are doing nothing more than delivering your expectations. It did not matter how hard you worked, it did not matter how much money you invested, it did not matter whether you thought you had something special – the simple fact is that you never expected to succeed and as always the Universe simply delivered what you asked for. This applies to everything – money, love, relationships.

Subconsciously you convinced yourself that something would go wrong. You probably drew up a mental list of potential reasons – a bad debt, unscrupulous partner, lack of support from bank, an unfaithful partner – you made it so easy for the Universe to deliver failure that it was amazing you lasted this long.

If this is you, where did it all start to go wrong? Did it begin in childhood where parents and teachers said you were a loser or should set your aspirations a little lower or did life gradually take its toll? Perhaps you are just one of those people that lets the smallest thing convince you that defeat is just around the corner.

If you are a serial failure then I admire your bravery. You have started again in the hope that this time it will be really different but you will never really be able to succeed until you change your mind-set and start to learn from previous mistakes.

So where do we start? It begins by taking a long hard look at yourself. You have to establish why you keep driving yourself forward. What are you trying to prove? You clearly feel that you are not a success or could be doing a lot better in relationships or in business.

Perhaps you feel that everyone else is better than you, more successful, wealthier, have all the right friends, connections and people in their lives – and you have not. At this stage I need to point out what I mean by success. If it is more money you want or a better relationship then I would like to point you to other blogs on this website.

All these things are attainable but you need to get the product right first. The product by the way is you.  Success starts with being comfortable and happy with yourself. To put it into perspective let’s look at a marketing analogy. You see advertised this great new food product which guarantees you will lose weight, is healthy and will turn you into the super person you have always wanted.

Off you go to the supermarket full of good intentions but when you get the product home you discover it tastes awful, the weight loss will take at least 10 years and you have to give up everything else you like. You never go back for a repeat purchase.

That’s you when you start something new. It looks great at the launch but when others see what’s on offer they turn away. They do this because as much as you have convinced yourself that this is really going to be something special you have not got the product right – underneath you are uncertain and people see that lack of confidence; because you don’t love yourself others quickly see through the veneer and walk away – you have the idea but not the confidence to make it succeed.

You cannot do anything in life until the product is right and the first step to avoid failure is to learn how to be positive. Start with the small things in your life and see them as successes – little victories quickly turn into bigger ones, once you get the hang of it.

Stop thinking about you all the time and think how you can help others. The law of attraction will respond by gradually bringing opportunity and success into your life. Stop being angry and bitter about previous things that have happened – you cannot change the past but you can learn from it.

Most of all – stop blaming others and look in the mirror. You have created your own reality and today you are where you wanted to be – consciously or sub consciously, you are the product and if it is ever to be ready for the market place then it is down to you to make the changes

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Don’t be confused about Karma and positive thinking

Karma and the deep rooted faith that surrounds this ancient belief, form a major part of some of the world’s greatest religions and when practiced by Buddhists, Sikhs or Hindus, is meant to illustrate responsibility and how we should treat other people. You cannot argue with centuries of such unwavering faith and ancient knowledge.

The problem is, that many people get confused with the concept of Karma and the spiritual way that it is practiced by the devout – and falsely compare it with some form of retribution on those that have done something bad.

Real Karma is not about punishment or reward. It is focussed instead on what you are doing or will do with your life – and most importantly the way you do things. Do not confuse Karma with how you think because this is what the Universe responds to and this is what causes stuff to happen – good and not so good.

We have to accept that there are many bad people who consistently get away with evil – and they continue to lead charmed lives seemingly free of any kind of punishment. This is because they do not regard their actions as bad or evil and do not believe they have done anything wrong.

At the other end of the spectrum there are numerous others who try to lead good lives but frequently fail to receive any kind of success or recognition. The big hearted, of course, never expect any kind of adulation, but sadly many others become bitter and frequently develop a sense of entitlement which reinforces their thoughts of lack – in both cases – the Universe never disappoints.

Powerful positive thinking and Karma therefore become blurred in people’s minds. The first is about what and how you think while the other is about the way you choose to lead your life. Let’s take charity and the concept of giving as a good example.

Charity is a huge part of positive thinking and frequently gets confused with Karma. Many believe that if you consistently give sums of cash to the needy then the Universe and positive thinking will take notice and magnify what you give by 10 or 20 times back into your bank account.

Be aware that this is not a done deal because it is the way you give and not the GIVING that matters. If you choose to give because you think you will get a return – it won’t happen. If you choose to give because of peer pressure or feel you are being forced to – the Universe will not like it.

It is what’s in your heart that really matters. If you feel good and happy about giving then the Universe will respect and understand the way you think about money and ensure that plenty more comes your way. Karma on the other hand is leading your life as a generous and caring person and giving where and when you can with no thought of reward.

The same rules apply to everything else you do in life. If you choose to take something on because you believe will receive a special benefit, then you are going to be disappointed because you have opted to do it for the wrong reasons.

And here lies the clue to powerful positive thinking – it is how you feel that plays a huge role in its success. If your heart tells you that it is right, if it is making you smile and if you are doing it for the right reasons, then the Universe will respond in kind.

That’s real karma because it’s the way you have chosen to lead your life and when you are in that state of mind the Universe will always be listening to what you need and will be ready to respond. Your thoughts will become more powerful and so will you – your journey begins here.

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More good reasons to stay positive when you are in real pain

It is about my family and dozens of ordinary people, friends and neighbours, medical professionals and acquaintances who were there when I needed them and demonstrated in the most practical of ways what love, real positive thinking and actions are all about.

Such people would almost certainly be there for you as well, but it is so easy to forget when you are weighed down by the troubles of the world, just how much support is out there. It does exist by the bucket load so never think you are entirely alone as I have been reminded in the last few days and why I will always choose to be positive even when life gets a little difficult.

Earlier this week I had a nasty fall, broke my arm and cracked a few ribs. The paramedics which arrived in just minutes then spent the next hour working out how to carry me from my home into the back of the ambulance to cause the least amount of pain.

As I fell backwards I remember thinking “this is going to hurt” and I was not disappointed. It was absolute agony as my arm hit the edge of a plant pot followed by a resounding crack to confirm that I had indeed broken my humerus, the not so funny name for the bone between your shoulder and elbow.

I was obviously making a bit of a fuss and within seconds I was surrounded by neighbours and friends who seemed to arrive from nowhere. Their concern was nothing short of amazing. They made me as comfortable as possible as I could not be moved – my left arm had apparently taken on a life of its own.

Yes, I was very much in pain but these people had stopped what they were doing to concentrate on me at that particular moment demonstrating the love and kindness that most humans radiate and allow to come to the surface at time of need.

When the paramedics finally got me on to a stretcher they took the slowest and easiest route to the hospital, trying to avoid bumps and potholes because every little movement was agony even with the morphine that was by now beginning to take effect.

On my arrival a whole NHS team of the most caring people I have ever met took over to relieve the pain, take tests, plaster me up, x-ray the damage and ensure that I could be on my way to recovery. The following day was just the same as these medical professionals bandaged and strapped me up for two months of recuperation.

As I write this blog very slowly using my one good hand I feel humbled by what I have seen and the messages of support I have since received. I have not felt at any one time that life has socked me a Lemon – quite the reverse.
I have seen human beings at their best practicing powerful positive thinking as they get on with their lives and jobs. It would have been easy to ask why this has happened to me; it would have been easy to bemoan my luck and while this fall is very inconvenient it is not the end of the world and I probably need the enforced rest anyway.

Such things have almost certainly happened in your lives and when they do you will be faced with the same choices as me. You can moan at the universe and tell everyone how unlucky you are or just be grateful that you have seen human nature at its best – and as soon as you are healed you will get on with your life in a positive way.
I intend to stay positive – what about you.

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Gratitude and how saying thank you attracts the good things in life

The skill is in finding things to be grateful for and if you are going through a difficult time right now then you might feel that I am asking the impossible, but sit back for a moment and take a long hard look at your life and you might be very surprised by what you discover.

Most of us lead fairly ordinary lives with the usual day to day worries but please stay with me as I will come back to you a little later. I first want to focus on the terminally ill, those that are handicapped, those going through a divorce, those facing extreme financial hardship, those that are being abused – such a list can be almost endless.

You would think that people facing such problems have little to be grateful for, but have you noticed how the terminally ill frequently set examples for the rest of us with their courage and fortitude – grateful for the lives they have had, the support of their families and thankful to have had another day. It is their gratitude and positive thinking that frequently works miracles, defeating the illness that has beset them.

Have you also noticed that those facing dramas such as a divorce, abuse, or money troubles suddenly realise what is really important in their lives and give thanks to that realisation. Positive thinking combined with gratitude helps to turn their lives around as well – and when the drama is finally over most will admit that they are now in a much better place.

For those facing extreme difficulties it is probably easier to identify what is really important – not so easy of course for the rest of us – I did say I would get back to you so thank you for staying with me thus far.

Everyday lives can by their very nature become humdrum, small dramas get exploded out of all proportion and the daily grind just goes on. You have already sunk into a negative pattern without realising it so things will slowly become more arduous, your relationships will seem dull and your job and home may lose its sparkle.

You have forgotten just how lucky and fortunate you really are and you have stopped saying thank you for the many blessings in your life. Have you got a nice home? Say Thank you. Great kids, family support, good job – say thank you. Did you feel healthy this morning, did you have a great breakfast, was the ride to work ok – then say thank you.

You have simply taken for granted the things in your life that really matter and thankfully you have not had to face any extreme issues to remind you of just how lucky you really are. That’s what I mean by taking a long hard look at your life and when you do this to coin an old fashioned phrase – count those blessings.

The power of positive thinking starts with gratitude because it helps you to focus on the good things in life. At the same time it will correct your thinking by seeing those good things for what they really are.

Like all things to do with positive thinking you do need to apply a little common sense. You are not going to change overnight from being dull negative person worn down by life and turn into superman or super woman.

Start in a small way from the moment you wake up. Say thank you for another day brimming with opportunity, say thank you that you have hot water and a warm home, say thank you that your family is well – you get the idea – keep finding things to be grateful for and express that gratitude throughout the day.

And as you go to sleep you might also want to go over your day and find something positive to say thank you for. By doing this you remain in a positive mind set and this also helps to attract anything else you are trying to manifest such as extra money or a lover,

By focussing on what you are grateful for then you are not going over what it is you want so you are leaving the universe to get on with the job of bringing you all the good things that you desire – now that really is something to be grateful for.

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The power of positive thinking and making it work for you

When used properly, the power of positive thinking is a force for good like no other, almost akin to a religion supported by an unwavering faith that everything will work out no matter what. It is proven to change lives because people always achieve more when they feel good about themselves and their goals.

Many of course, strive to reach such levels of perfection and while there are numerous examples of exceptionally religious people together with a few other individuals who claim to have reached such heights, for most of us the real power of positive thinking continues to remain elusive.

The trouble is that most of us want to be positive but find it difficult to stay the course and when they stumble they convince themselves that they should probably have never bothered in the first place. It is one of the reasons why I developed the 30 Day Challenge to enable people to recognise that life is not always plain sailing – and to remind themselves to stay focussed, they are encouraged to give a simple flick of the wristband.

You can read more about the challenge on other pages on this website, but for the moment I just want to examine the concept of the power of positive thinking and put it into some kind of logical perspective because it is something that continues to remain very misunderstood.

Many who decide to embrace the power begin so enthusiastically that they manifest the exact opposite of what they are trying to achieve. They seem to be on a personal crusade to change their lives and do it with such intensity that it becomes impossible for the universe to ever deliver.

They are like a dog with a bone, forever returning to the object they most desire and by focusing so much thought on the thing or things they want most, they slowly but surely drive it or them even further away.

The power of positive thinking, like everything else in life, works a lot better when you are relaxed. If you are tense when you’re driving the more likely it is that you will make mistakes. If you are out for the evening with the love of your life they will not have a very good time if they can see that you are stressed out and anxious.

So Rule One – Relax! You have already decided what you need to change your life. You have focussed on it, worked out the detail, decided what will happen as things change and now you are ready and expectant.

You now really have to forget all about it. You must have faith that your message has been sent and received. The universe now wants you to have what you most desire – assuming of course that you have used plenty of common sense in your manifestation. You are unlikely to become a brain surgeon next week if you have never been to medical school – you get the idea.

Faith and action is all you need from this point onwards. Stop focussing on the idea but move things along if you can by talking to the right people, making the right moves, taking some sort of action to reinforce your desire – but you must ignore and forget about your order to the universe.

That is the real power of positive thinking – you having faith that what you have asked for is coming your way. You have no idea how that is going happen and it is none of your concern but circumstances will combine to ensure that one day they delivery person will be knocking on your door.

But if you keep focussing on what you need most then it will never happen for you. Positive thinking will be working against you and you will lose faith and you will be one of the millions that will shrug their shoulders and justify your actions by claiming that you thought it was a load of rubbish anyway.

Just remember – that even the most power positive thinking gurus had to start somewhere – and they were just like you.

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